What is Self Esteem?

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities get on top of us, we can start to think “I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.The reality is that most people are just as scared and insecure than us, if not more.

Many apparently beautiful or successful people share these worries and concerns. For example, that gorgeous eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Champagne. You might think to yourself, ‘she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But the chances are that if you could read through her transparent mind, you might be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?… Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my legs, they look too skinny… I wish I was as clever as my best friend.”

Alternatively that young business entrepreneur who when you see you think, “what else could he ask for?”  He could well be looking at himself at the mirror and saying to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope my dad will one day be proud of me.”

Other peoples life’s are not perfect

You see, this is the simple fact, We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them. At the same time they are look at us and thinking the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us.

This is low self esteem at work. Focusing on what we haven’t got, what we think we are not good at, rather than things we are good at or the things that we have.

Healthy levels of self esteem

By way of contrast people with a good level of self esteem will exhibit the following characteristics;

1. They don’t worry about what has happened in the past,
2. They trust their ability to solve problems,
3. But they are not afraid to ask for help when they need it,
4. They believe they are good and interesting people,
5. They are aware of other people feelings and treat them with respect,
6. They live their life by a set of principles and are prepared to defend those principles.

Or to put it another way, these people have learnt to accept and love who they are and what they are capable of. We should all aim to learn to love ourselves.